6 Steps To Success Achieve Your Goal With DESIRE, by Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes

Definition

DESIRE uses cognitive behavioral therapy and motivation interviewing techniques to outline 6 steps to success

D: Describe the Goal

Describe what you want to achieve

I want to stop watching porn , be in a place where even if i see a little bit of nudity it wont temp me to go ahead and watch the full thing.
I want to be able to hold my temptation be strong

**Specific
- What do you want to do? Stop watching porn.
- How will it move you toward your rich and meaningful life? By stop watching porn i will be smarter than i am, it will allow me to stop wasting time and do a lot of productive things , and maybe my relationships will be improved too.
**Measurable
- How will you know when you are done? I will know when i am done when even if i am alone at night on my bed right after i sleep , i drop my phone or computer and sleep without any need to resist myself not to watch it because i am completely over it , and even if i am lonely and alone i do other things but not watch it.
**Achievable
- Can you realistically do it? Yes i can realistically do it because it doable and i have done it once for completely 30 days, and a lot of people do it .
**Relevant
- Will this achieve the desired outcome? This will help me get smarter, socialize more, read more.
**Time Limited
- Daily, Weekly, Monthly annual goals ( Identify something that you can achieve or accomplish today towards my goal, something withing a week) and give yourself a reward.
  - I will take 3 days off , and write down triggers that cursed urges and how how i handled them.
  - Reward myself with Rufaida Yogurt.

E: Explore Motivation

Explore and Address the benefits and drawbacks to working on this Goal

Motivation Comes In 5 Different Areas

Physical: How are you going to feel physically (sleep, energy, pain/discomfort)
Affective: How are you going to feel mentally (Anxiety , frustration etc)
Cognitive: How is it going to improve your attitude (Thinking skills)
Environmental: How is it going to impact your ADLs (Activities of Daily Living), Finances and Hobbies
Relational: How is it going to impact your relationship with others

Area	Work Towards This Goal	Stay the Same
Physical	- More energy and motivation to exercise or hit the gym.- Better sleep and focus.- Healthier dopamine levels; improved stamina and confidence.- Reduced fatigue and guilt after relapse.	- Constant tiredness or brain fog.- Unhealthy sleep patterns.- Energy crashes and lack of motivation.
Affective (Emotional/Mental)	- Feel happier, calmer, and more confident.- Reduced anxiety, guilt, and frustration.- More control over emotions and urges.	- Stay anxious, ashamed, and emotionally unstable.- Constant frustration and self-blame.
Cognitive (Thinking/Attitude)	- Clearer thinking and sharper focus.- More discipline and productivity.- Improved memory and creativity.- Better problem-solving mindset.	- Stay distracted and unmotivated.- Mental fog and low discipline.- Poor focus on studies or goals.
Environmental (Daily Life, Finances, Hobbies)	- More time and energy for hobbies, fitness, coding, and learning.- Save money and reduce wasted hours.- Stronger self-control over devices and digital habits.	- Continue wasting time online.- Miss out on opportunities for self-improvement.- Stay stuck in unproductive routines.
Relational (Social and Interpersonal)	- More comfortable around people.- Improved communication and empathy.- Stronger and more meaningful relationships.- Respect and trust from others.	- Stay isolated or socially awkward.- Damaged trust or intimacy in relationships.- Difficulty connecting with real people.
Benefits Summary	- Feel alive, focused, and confident.- Build mental toughness.- Grow emotionally, socially, and intellectually.	- No growth, more anxiety, and continued regret.
Drawbacks Summary	- Short-term discomfort while breaking the habit.- Must learn new coping skills and stay consistent.- Requires effort and patience.	- Long-term misery and stagnation.- Loss of time, confidence, and relationships.

S: Seek Support And Knowledge

Change causes crisis and crisis causes change!

Who can encourage you and how?
What ADLs can you delegate to free up time?
Who can mentor you?

I: Identify The Steps

Break the goal down into baby steps with target dates

Create a master plan

What is the first thing you need to do?
When can you realistically get that done by?
Is there something you need to do which can be finished sooner?
(Iterate and apply DESIRE to each of the steps as needed)

R: Remove Obstacles

What has stopped you in the past?
- Time
- Knowledge
- Organization
- Planning/goal setting
- Finances
- Fear
  - Failure(Perfection)
  - Rejection(lack of support)

E: Envision Success

Envision yourself achieving that goal

Each night before bed, see yourself achieving your overall goal
Each morning (before you get up) envision yourself successfully completing your goal for the day

Summary

DESIRE uses a combination of CBT and motivational interviewing to help you achieve your goals.
You can use DESIRE to define your long term goals (like getting a degree) as well as short term goals that will help you achieve the long term goal.
- Choosing a school, applying, getting aid, selecting a major, registering for classes, getting books, scheduling coursework etc.